Redemption

31 days of good

Abuse Survivor, Angels, Art, Faith, grandchildren, heaven, mixed media painting, painting, Peace, Redemption, Trust, Vulnerability, wisdom, wonder

Day 7 – Sovereignty

Baby Henry slept over last night.

Sweet boy startled for some reason around 8 and began to cry.

Really cry.

Upset.

Grandma tried to let him have the infant resolve to resolve his fear or big emotion.

I caved.

We sat together after the sweetness of a sway that became a firm embrace and he was awake and it seemed thinking until I laid his little body back down.

Sleep continued until 6:13.

He woke happy, ready for the day.

Still dark outside, we walked about the house, down the hall, to the kitchen and with one hand clutching coffee and the other balancing baby, we decided to say good morning to the day.

I walked into the twilight, looked up and said, “Look, Henry, a morning moon just for us.”

Soft peaks of clouds broken and scattered and in the center filtered through the shifting, a very bright little moon.

And I was awed in a sort of tiny way when I thought about the serendipity type occurrence.

Sovereign God knows me so very well.

Knew the baby and I would walk into the dark of a Saturday morning and I would glance up and stand still until my glancing became a soul tending gaze.

Henry mirroring my face towards heaven.

This 31 days of good is I’m afraid not keeping its promise for light and “less, Lisa”.

Still, today very, very early, there was this moon and because I believe in a God who is very near, not at all far away.

My good thing today is the miraculously unable to comprehend, only celebrate.

Sovereignty,

the God who designed the riddle of me, being sovereign over me.

Singing like a whisper.

I painted today, covered over another abstract and just let it be and not be until it told the story I was holding.

Singing Over Us (detail)

Singing over me, singing over you.

God is.

Continue and believe.

31 days of good

contentment, courage, Faith, grace, hope, love, patience, Peace, Redemption, Vulnerability, wisdom, wonder

Day 6 – Sunrise

Surprised by a sky striped pink on an unnecessarily early rising morning.

Coffee in hand, I tiptoed out into the misty air and watched it change, go away, fade just as quickly as I glimpsed it and decided to chase it, keep it somehow longer.

Just a moment, a moment later and I’d have missed it completely.

Cherish some small quickly fading thing today.

Like the splendor of a sunrise, the wisdom of an ancient “preacher”, the author of Ecclesiastes.

“Again I saw that under the sun the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, nor bread to the wise, nor riches to the intelligent, nor favor to those with knowledge, but time and chance happen to them all.”
‭‭Ecclesiastes‬ ‭9‬:‭11‬ ‭ESV‬‬

31 days of good

Art, contentment, creativity, Faith, grace, hope, mixed media painting, painting, Redemption, rest, Trust, Vulnerability, wisdom

Day 5 – Soft Color, Soft Words

I played with oils and then wiped the paint off. I erased the thick blocks of color and decided against dark hues.

I rediscovered the wisdom and woes of Solomon, the writer of Ecclesiastes.

Wisdom, woe, striving, resting, racing…a worrisome road.

I loved one verse about the flow of water, the destination the ocean.

I considered how we don’t fear the overflow, the break of dam, the flooding of our land because of the ocean.

I decided I could never understand this, only love it.

Live it,embrace it.

The truth of Ecclesiastes, of a painting softened by worn down pastel.

I’m thinking now of my friend.

Her kind instruction.

Paint for pleasure. Paint for you.

Flow.

“All streams run to the sea, but the sea is not full; to the place where the streams flow, there they flow again.”
‭‭Ecclesiastes‬ ‭1‬:‭7‬ ‭ESV

31 days of good

birds, bravery, contentment, Faith, grace, mercy, Redemption, Trust, Vulnerability, walking, wonder

Day 4 – grace

I woke this morning with a nudge, actually a shameful shove. Maybe only I’d know it.

Words shared were hard, a hint of judgment.

So, I asked for mercy, for any damage to be undone and I went on in to the morning.

Saw a sparrow in a flash of flight on the porch, a morning glory vine with only one bloom, and a glimmer of light through a spot in the brush.

And I decided to give myself grace.

To filter future thoughts the best I can through a measure and pause…

Offer hope, don’t harbor wrong.

I am strong because grace is strong, I am steady in the embrace of grace.

Grace, the timidity of its tone, an invitation to live gently, privately strong. No need for notice, trophy or display of said strength.

Go quietly with grace.

31 days of good

aging, confidence, contentment, kindness, Peace, Redemption, Trust, Vulnerability, wisdom

Day 3 : a smile

She walked poised and steady in the center of the corridor. She must’ve been done with the testing.

I sat in the in between solo waiting space with just one chair. I heard her steps, anticipated my name being called.

Instead, her eyes met mine.

“Good Morning”, she told me and and I answered her in the same greeting.

She smiled.

Smiled and kept walking.

Carried on.

And I remembered a word that came in reply on a quiet walking prayer.

“It’s gonna be alright.”

The promise, very same promise as this morning in the confident smile of a woman in a corridor, a place for tests.

It’s gonna be alright.

😊

“Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭31‬:‭25‬-‭26‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Day 3 – a smile from a kind stranger, good things

Hope On

Abuse Survivor, bravery, contentment, courage, creativity, doubt, Faith, grace, grief, hope, memoir, mercy, Peace, Redemption, rest, Trust, Vulnerability, waiting, wisdom, wonder

“…Be careful, be quiet, do not fear, and do not let your heart be faint…
‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭7‬:‭4‬ ‭ESV

Of all the seasons, Fall feels most like either a resistance to or a gentle walk with open hearts and hands into new.

Fresh wind, fresh chances to let things die (finally) and wait for new after the coming Winter, uncertainty of hard and cold.

Waiting requires hope and hope never disappoints. An open heart, hands opened to let God handle what you’ve been clenching way too long.

The leaves are loosened from the trees, their dance is light and free, letting go with glee. There’s a metaphor here, a message for me maybe you, indeed.

Open hands, open heart, thriving souls.

I plant tiny and tender violas, the most fragile of petals and yet they survive the change, the wind, the cooler and brittle air.

Precious flowers, every year planted to sort of honor my grandmother and to tangibly decide to believe,

Hope won’t put me to shame.

Hope never disappoints.

Hope is soft, a demeanor of belief, whereas as dread, fear, speculation or defeat offer nothing at all,

only take and tie up our precious souls, leave us to decide we’re worthless, discarded, without hope.

Choose to hope.

“Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭23‬:‭18‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Passing Through

Art, artist calendar, contentment, courage, Faith, Forgiveness, freedom, hope, mercy, painting, Peace, Redemption, rest, Salvation, wisdom, wonder

This cross on canvas was added to my website on Monday. It’s 5×7, small enough for a shelf or side table. Beside it is an old ceramic rooster. I don’t know if I collected it or inherited it from my mama.

There’s a basket full of beach shells and a jar filled with goose feathers from “Aunt Boo’s”. The antique dry sink was Greg’s mama’s.

When I pass by in my coming or going, my eye meets the cross and I pause if only for a second. I am just passing by, passing through, heading to the laundry room or out the door for the day.

Yesterday, I looked through the verses I chose for the 2024 calendar. I found the one I’d pulled from the passage about the woman at the well.

I especially rested on a few words. “he had to pass through”.

“And he had to pass through Samaria.”
‭‭John‬ ‭4‬:‭4‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Traveling alone, walking from Judea to Galilee, he sat down to rest beside a well.

And a woman with a sordid past met Him, He met her there.

I think that’s what this cross and all the crosses signify for me and I pray for the ones who have one for themselves or have gifted them.

When they pass by and glance for a second, I hope they know, sense, and remember, Jesus meeting them there.

Holy Spirit whispering, all will be well.

John included this brief story of lasting significance in his recordings of all of Jesus’s healing, all of his many experiences with Jesus. He included for, centuries later, women like me who are reminded and receive new mercies every moment because of its significance.

Your personal story of being met by Jesus matters. Treasure it. Cleave to it. Strengthen it.

But, don’t keep it to yourself. There are many people in need of it, of being quenched by living water, freely offered no matter the present or past.

In your passing through, be very sure,

Jesus is near.

(Crosses are available (custom orders too) at Quiet Confidence Art

Begin to Live

aging, Children, contentment, courage, Faith, family, fear, Holy Spirit, hope, memoir, patience, Peace, Prayer, Redemption, Salvation, Stillness, waiting, wisdom, wonder
God is Near

Mingled in a dream that included family at the beach as well as unfamiliar children asking to play on a trampoline, I am recalling “Psalm 90”.

The Spirit of God interspersed just that in a dream that included my mama being a given a healing prognosis, “Now, you’ll have a chance to really live!”

Maybe it was the beautiful and educational sermon on Sunday on heaven.

“Before the mountains were brought forth, or ever you had formed the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭90‬:‭2‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Maybe it was the call from “Aunt Boo” my mama’s sister. She talked about crocheting. Maybe I tucked away the visual of her teaching my mama, the memory of their back and to sister chatter.

Who knows? Around 3, I woke and tossed and then recited mentally, over and over, Psalm 23.

Imperfectly still, after all these years of using this chapter to calm me. For some reason, portions and not the entire Psalm linger longer than others and I drift off to sleep.

Note the commentary

All my days have been a meandering sort of trail. A pause to consider, I’ve been in the darkness, I’ve lived in the dread, I’ve found myself off course because of conflict or circumstance.

David knew. He did too.

And so, his words aren’t ones of a perfect follower. Instead, a perfect “returner” to the place where he and God dwell together safely.

I used to believe “all the days of my life” meant the actual dwelling place of Jesus…heaven.

Again, instead…David is acknowledging and giving us permission to acknowledge the beauty we can claim as our own here…

As long as my lungs are providing me with breath and my heart is beating…I am dwelling with God, and He with me.

We are together.

I am known. I am seen.

I am invited to keep returning to rest.

Why Psalm 90 mixed in with a captivating dream of life getting another chance for my mama?

Psalm 90 is one penned by Moses.

It opens with this.

“Lord, you have been our dwelling place in all generations.”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭90‬:‭1‬ ‭ESV‬‬

There were other people in the big bright room with my mama, not just my brothers and sister. My children were there too.

Psalm 90 closes with an acknowledgement of what had not and has not been without affliction. Moses offers us his prayer back then as a promise and prayer we can choose today.

“Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, and for as many years as we have seen evil. Let your work be shown to your servants, and your glorious power to their children.

Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands upon us; yes, establish the work of our hands!”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭90‬:‭15‬-‭17‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Favor” here meaning “beauty”.

Return to beauty today.

Embrace grace. More than you expected, the grace you’ve been shown.

The grace that you know.

Continue and believe.

Dwell in peace.

“Now you can begin to live”, the words promised to my mama in my dream.

And to us all.

Begin.

Begin again.

Wounded Weepers and Seekers

aging, contentment, courage, Faith, grace, Holy Spirit, obedience, Prayer, Redemption, rest, Trust, Vulnerability, wisdom, wonder

I wondered as I refreshed my memory on the prophet Jeremiah, why he’d been marked with the identity of the “weeping prophet”.

“You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.”
‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭29‬:‭13‬ ‭ESV‬‬

His call was to restore the people he loved to a relationship with God the creator rather than pursuit of other gods and things.

He wasn’t very successful. His success was committed obedience regardless.

Strange Waking Words

Jeremiah asks, “Is there no physician there? Is there no balm in Gilead…why then has the health of my people not been restored?” (Jeremiah 8:18-22)

On Tuesday morning, God woke me with a promise, “there is a balm in Gilead”.

A lingering cough and congestion with no other symptoms caused me to decide I’m getting older and I just don’t bounce back as quickly. Still, it was strange to wake with that very first thought.

Clearly, my heart was in need as well as my body.

Still, strange if it’s difficult to believe what you can’t see…that Jesus lives within us, the Holy Spirit…the comforter.

So, to be told, “Lisa, there is a balm in Gilead.” (just that clearly) was to remind me of the Healer of all my wounds, those already well and those in the process of true wellness.

I had no idea. I understand balm as sort of a salve like Neosporin but no clue about Gilead.

I discovered there’s no verse with this promise, only one that questioned why wasn’t there, why was there no balm?

And old hymn came from this same wondering of someone long ago…

“There Is A Balm In Gilead”

Traditional Spiritual

There is a balm in Gilead to make the wounded whole, there is a balm in Gilead to heal the sin-sick soul.
Sometimes I feel discouraged and think my work’s in vain, but then the Holy Spirit revives my soul again.
There is a balm in Gilead to make the wounded whole, there is a balm in Gilead to heal the sin-sick soul.
If you cannot preach like Peter, if you cannot pray like Paul, you can tell the love of Jesus and say, “He died for all.”

So, I sketched a wounded and contemplative woman in the margin, the words alongside her…There is a balm in Gilead to make the wounded whole.

She’s thoughtful, a wonderer.

That’s a beautiful promise.

Listen

Lord, I was near enough to your heart to hear this the other morning. Draw me nearer, I pray. Help me to be a seeker.

Jeremiah penned the verses adorning well wishing cards at graduation, the ones that proclaim we all have a purpose and I wonder; actually, I believe he questioned his purpose when it didn’t pan out, when it seemed it nor he made a difference in his calling.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭29‬:‭11‬ ‭ESV‬‬

There’s not always a straight path, life circumvents what we hoped would be our future or at least would give us hope.

Jeremiah wondered why there was no healing, no physician, no balm in Gilead and centuries later, someone penned the words to a hymn that promised healing, one that said, there wasn’t a balm then; but, then came Jesus.

And Jesus woke with me the words to that very song.

Strange? Not at all.

A wounded seeker He knew was in need.

Continue and believe.

You are so very loved.