I came in the back door after a day in the country with grandbaby boy and barely paused.

I grabbed the dog’s leash and tightened my shoelaces.

There was enough daylight still for a walk.

The Labrador deserved it.

He’d been alone all day.

Later, my husband praised my commitment. He said he admired the way I “keep going”, I guess pursuing wellness.

I begged to differ with him and then rethought that and accepted his compliment.

Then I told him, with a strong tone of certainty,

“I probably won’t change in size very much again. I’ve stayed and will stay the same weight for about three years.”

Then, he replied with some sort of observation about his approving view of me from the rear.

This morning, I had a veggie omelet and a piece of bread toasted, slathered in butter and topped with “Braswell’s red pepper” jelly. (IYKYK)

And I remembered the conversation about my body.

I remembered telling my husband, I mostly just want to be and stay strong.

Breakfast memories popped up.

My grandmother, “Bama” in the kitchen in front of the gas stove, rollers in her hair and dressed in a tiny floral print housecoat.

The grandmother who greeted her oldest granddaughter with

“There’s my big ‘ol girl!”

as I wrapped my arms around her leg and sunk my head into her hip.

I’ve been known to say that her greeting marked me. I suppose in some ways it did and it has.

If I’m honest though, there are other more beautiful imprints.

There was the outside play, the daily long walks on dirt roads to come home to ice water in the aluminum pitcher in the Frigidaire.

There were tiny pancakes with tiny pieces of bacon in the center.

There were games of “Scramble” with a notebook of words created by her and as I grew older, my name in a column next to hers.

My name in her Bible, I didn’t discover until she’d passed on.

And wisdom through words about beauty being internal first and only.

“Pretty is

Is pretty does” Bama

I pray and believe my grandmother will greet me one day…my arms outstretched to hers…

She’ll say,

“There’s my pretty girl!”

And I’ll say

Yes, it’s me.

Pretty and strong.

Yes, it’s me.

Here I am.